12 October 2007

J.Lo's bump: the mystery continues and no one cares (or everyone cares?)

I'm not sure why every media outlet is paying such close attention to J.Lo's womb. Perhaps it's her seemingly 'barren' status that get everyone all a twitter with the slightest suggestion of tummy swelling. However, much like Christina Aguilera, whenever J.Lo does announce her pregnancy or her body starts to betray the most poorly kept secret in Hollywood, will anyone even care? For the time being we are stuck with every news outlet analysing every flowy dress she wears, all of the vaguely discernible sightings of a 'baby bump'. Even Us magazine says 'She is pregnant' on this week's cover. The world is waiting with bated breath to know if the woman famous for her junk in the trunk is holding precious cargo.

The New York Daily News has a few ideas as to why J.Lo is keeping mum:

10. After the poor reception of her other collaborations with Marc Anthony, she's not releasing this baby.
9. She's waiting for the announcement cards to be rhinestoned.
8. Versace doesn't make maternity wear.
7. She's only releasing a Spanish-language version of the child.
6. She wants to spite Marc Anthony's ex-wife, Dayanara Torres, for spilling the beans before she could. No one steals Jen's baby thunder!
5. She's nervous the kid won't be as cute as Violet Affleck.
4. She's worried the bump will detract attention from her booty.
3. It's important to know the sex before designing her own line of velour onesies.
2. She did announce it. She did it in a song from her new album. What? Didn't you listen to it?
1. K-Fed is the father.

Source: http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2007/10/11/2007-10 11_theres_a_reason_mums_the_word_from_momst.html

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The Baby Bump Project by Meredith Nash is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.